SELFIE GAME STRONG
If there is one thing I do well it’s take a photo. After all, I am a child of the 1990’s Madonna mainstreamed Vogue, RuPaul taught us how to “Weeeeerk!” in the 00’s Tyra Banks gave us America’s Top Supermodel and we learned how to hit the angles, to smize and how to elongate if I didn’t learn to model in the era of the supermodel I may as well just hang it up! I am 5’4”, when people see me in person after consuming my internet content they often muse over my height. They think I am taller, bigger. The reality is that I have a big personality, it carries through all of my shots and I am unapologetic about a photo-op. I must give credit were credit is due. I graduated from the school of Tyra Banks and it shows in every image.
Tip one, always find the light. Next get out of your head. Perform for the camera and think about the image and how you want to be perceived. Last but equally important, know your angles. Are you serving sexy, showing strength, capturing your comedic side? Each expression is an emotion that will live on in each image. I also think we’ve been conditioned to feel that photos of ourselves is narcissistic but no one scoffs at people who post hundreds of photos of their offspring which in my opinion there is nothing more narcissistic - another opinion for another day.
Taking selfies, particularly sexy ones, often sparks discussions about narcissism and self-obsession. The perception of narcissism arises from the belief that individuals who frequently take and share selfies are excessively focused on their own appearance and seeking validation from others. This view is supported by some psychological studies suggesting a link between frequent selfie-taking and narcissistic traits, such as a need for admiration and a preoccupation with self-image.
It's essential to recognize the nuances in this perception. For many, taking selfies is not about seeking external validation but rather a form of self-expression and self-empowerment. It can be a way to document personal growth, celebrate one's appearance, and boost self-confidence. The act of taking a selfie can also be therapeutic, allowing individuals to see themselves from different perspectives and appreciate their unique features.
The societal context plays a significant role in shaping the perception of narcissism. In a culture that often scrutinizes and criticizes appearances, taking control of one's image through selfies can be a powerful act of self-affirmation. You are not alone in self admiration, A survey of 2,000 Americans — split evenly by gender and age — examined their thoughts and views on intimate photos and found that a third of all respondents have sent an intimate photo in the past, which means there is an untold percent of people who’ve taken the time to take an intimate photo of themselves.
So often, when we are encouraged to take sexy photos, we are encouraged to take them for someone else to admire when we should take photos for ourselves that make us admire ourselves. Ultimately, the key is balance and intention. While it's crucial to be aware of the potential for perceived narcissism, it's equally important to allow oneself the freedom to enjoy and celebrate one's image in a healthy, confident manner.
Taking a sexy selfie can be a fun and empowering experience, but it’s important to strike a balance between feeling confident and ensuring the photo is tasteful enough that it wouldn’t embarrass you if it were seen by others. Here are some tips to help you take a sexy selfie that you will love, cherish, and be proud of, even if it ends up in the wrong hands.
I have done this. My sexy selfie ended up in the wrong hands. In my case, I sent nudes to the family group chat. I thank my lucky stars for an understanding and encouraging mother. She may have thought otherwise if it hadn’t been a tasteful shot! This shot is so good that I could frame it and if It leaked people would likely say, “I get it.” Which is the point of a selfie and a sexy selfie at that.
HOW TO TAKE A SHARE-WORTHY SELFIE:
1. Know Your Angles: Understanding your best angles is crucial for any selfie. Spend some time experimenting with different poses and perspectives. Tilt your head slightly to the side, find your best profile, and consider the lighting and shadows that highlight your features in the most flattering way. Practicing in front of a mirror can help you discover which angles make you feel most confident and look your best.
2. Lighting is Key: Good lighting can make or break a photo. Natural light is often the most flattering, so take advantage of it by positioning yourself near a window. Soft, diffused light can enhance your skin tone and highlight your features without casting harsh shadows. If you're indoors, consider using a ring light or other soft lighting sources to create a warm, inviting glow.
3. Choose the Right Background: The background of your selfie can significantly impact the overall impression of the photo. Opt for a clean, uncluttered space that won’t distract from your subject—yourself. A simple, elegant backdrop, such as a solid-colored wall or a tastefully decorated room, can keep the focus on you while adding to the photo’s aesthetic appeal.
4. Dress (or Undress) to Impress: Your choice of clothing (or lack thereof) plays a big role in the tone of your selfie. Wear something that makes you feel sexy and confident, whether it's lingerie, a favorite outfit, or even a well-placed sheet or towel. The key is to feel comfortable and empowered in what you’re wearing. Remember, sometimes less is more, and a little bit of mystery can be incredibly alluring.
5. Pay Attention to Your Expression: Your facial expression can convey a lot of emotion and set the tone for your selfie. A sultry gaze, a playful smile, or a relaxed, natural look can all be sexy in their own way. Practice different expressions to find the one that feels most authentic to you. Confidence is incredibly attractive, so let that shine through in your eyes and smile.
6. Use Editing Sparingly: While it’s tempting to use filters and editing tools to enhance your photo, less is often more. Minor adjustments to brightness, contrast, and color can help bring out the best in your photo, but avoid over-editing. Keeping your selfie looking natural will make it more timeless and less likely to embarrass you if it’s ever seen by unintended viewers.
7. Think About the Composition: The rule of thirds is a helpful guideline for composing a visually appealing photo. Imagine your frame divided into nine equal parts by two horizontal and two vertical lines. Positioning yourself off-center can create a more dynamic and interesting composition. Also, consider the overall balance of the photo, ensuring that elements within the frame complement each other.
8. Respect Your Privacy: Finally, be mindful of where and how you share your sexy selfie. Even with the best intentions, photos can sometimes end up in places you didn’t intend. Consider keeping personal photos in a secure, private location and sharing them only with trusted individuals.
*Just remember, anything you share is no longer yours. It’s now for the streets to see, a sexy selfie that you’ll love, and that will stand the test of time as a beautiful, confident representation of yourself.