THE YOUNG AND THE SEXLESS
The perception that all single people are living a life of constant sexual escapades is a prevalent myth. While it's true that being single can provide the freedom and flexibility to engage in sexual activities on a whim, research shows that single people are not necessarily having more sex than their married counterparts. A 2023 Psychology Today article highlights that the sexual activity rates between single and married individuals are strikingly similar. According to the article, 36% of single people and 35% of married people report having sex 1–3 times per month. Meanwhile, 34% of single people and 36% of married people have sex 1–3 times per week. This data suggests that the difference in sexual activity between single and married people is marginal. In other words, being single doesn’t ensure a rambunctious sex life, but neither does having a husband.
However, when looking specifically at individuals who are dating, the numbers tell a slightly different story. People who are dating tend to be more sexually active, with 44% reporting having sex 1–3 times per week. This higher rate of sexual activity may be linked to the excitement and novelty that often accompanies new relationships. The honeymoon phase of dating typically includes a period of heightened attraction and physical intimacy, which can explain the increased frequency of sex among those actively dating compared to their single or married peers.
The idea that single people are perpetually on the prowl for sex is a stereotype that doesn't reflect the diverse realities of single life… single people have complex and fulfilling lives, often finding happiness and satisfaction outside the realm of romantic relationships.
Historically, married couples reported more frequent sexual activity than single individuals, but this gap has been closing since the 2000s. For example, in 2014, married people reported having sex 55 times per year, compared to 59 times for unmarried people. The narrowing of this gap may be influenced by the trend of people marrying later in life. The median age of first marriage has increased to 29.5 for men and 27.4 for women. Additionally, from 2000 to 2018, the percentage of married men who reported having sex at least once a week decreased from 71.1% to 57.7%, and for married women, it fell from 69.1% to 60.9%. Opinion: I blame Donald Trump. He stressed us out an his voice is like a vaginal antihistamine.
The idea that single people are perpetually on the prowl for sex is a stereotype that doesn't reflect the diverse realities of single life. Studies have shown that single people have complex and fulfilling lives, often finding happiness and satisfaction outside the realm of romantic relationships. In fact, 2017 was a significant year for challenging misconceptions about single people's lives, happiness, and self-worth. That year saw the release of several large-scale studies debunking the myth of the inferior life experiences of single individuals. These studies highlighted that single people, contrary to popular belief, could lead rich, meaningful lives filled with personal growth and contentment.
The changing dynamics around marriage and sexual activity reflect broader societal shifts. In 2017, the U.S. Census Bureau reported that more than 110 million adults in the United States were not married, accounting for over 45% of Americans aged 18 or older. Moreover, people who did choose to marry were waiting longer to tie the knot. A report from the Pew Research Center predicted that about one in four young adults today would remain single throughout their lives.
34% of single people and 36% of married people have sex 1–3 times per week.
The rise in individualistic practices, such as living alone, is not limited to Western societies; it has become a global trend. A study analyzing data from 1960 to 2011 across 78 nations found that individualistic practices increased significantly in 83% of the countries. Valuing personal independence, career ambitions, and friendships more than traditional family structures is becoming more common worldwide.
Marriage is no longer considered a crucial milestone of adulthood. A 2017 Census Bureau report indicated that 55% of respondents did not view getting married as an essential criterion for becoming an adult, and the same percentage said that having children was not a necessary milestone. Instead, achieving educational goals and securing full-time employment were seen as more important indicators of adulthood, with 95% of respondents valuing these criteria.
Marriage is no longer considered a crucial milestone of adulthood.
The myth that single people are consistently more sexually active than their married counterparts is not supported by the data. Whether single, married, or dating, people's sexual activities are shaped more by personal circumstances and life stages than by their relationship status. The evolving views on marriage, adulthood, and personal fulfillment suggest a more nuanced understanding of single life, one that embraces individuality and the diverse ways people find meaning and joy.